Articles tagged with: disclosure

Disclosure – am I doing it right?

published: May, 22, 2014 Written by // Guest Authors - Revolving Door Categories // Dating, Social Media, Gay Men, Youth, Revolving Door, Lifestyle, Guest Authors, Living with HIV, Population Specific , Sex and Sexuality

Guest Jayce Carberry on love sex and relationships. Jayce has tried disclosing up front and it's no longer working for him, so he’s trying another approach.

Disclosure – am I doing it right?

This article previously appeared on Jayce’s own blog here. Hey everyone!! Whether it is purely self-preservation or just to avoid ‘that conversation’, I have always mentioned my HIV status on all the sites and numerous apps I use, in the hope that just by chance, Mr. Right or Mr. Perfect would be there! It has always, to me, been second nature to disclose and I would never change that, but I have noticed something over the last year of being single. Previous to my diagnosis, I never

POZ magazine’s 20th anniversary

published: May, 20, 2014 Written by // Bob Leahy - Publisher Categories // Activism, Gay Men, International , Living with HIV, Media, Opinion Pieces, Population Specific , Bob Leahy - Publisher

Bob Leahy writes about the connection he has with the first issue of POZ, with a reminder of its very first editorial by Sean Strub.

POZ magazine’s 20th anniversary

Like many people I’m sure, I like to think I have a special relationship with POZ magazine, twenty years old last month. Here’s mine.  I was diagnosed with HIV in September 1993, I was working at the time in a lofty position with one of the major Canadian banks, senior enough to have an office on the 53rd floor with a commanding view of the Toronto waterfront. I had a secretary just outside my door. So It was inconceivable that I would tell anyone that a) I was gay, b) I had contracte

What is living with HIV?

published: April, 29, 2014 Categories // Gay Men, Living with HIV, Opinion Pieces, Population Specific

Rodney Rousseau asks “What is an HIV-positive identity? Is identity a useful way of thinking about how HIV plays out in our day-to-day lives?”

What is living with HIV?

Let me start this piece by highlighting that my last article talked about how I’ve engaged with gay and queer identities. Reading that piece may help contextualize some of the thoughts I’m about to share regarding HIV and identity.  So, how does HIV engage with our self-identity? What is an HIV-positive identity? Is identity a useful way of thinking about how HIV plays out in our day-to-day lives?  In many cases, those of us living with HIV hate to be ‘defined’ by HIV. We don’t

Coming out as HIV-positive... AGAIN

published: April, 23, 2014 Categories // Gay Men, Revolving Door, Guest Authors, Living with HIV, Opinion Pieces, Population Specific

From FS Magazine, tackling the question “what do you do when you get a new job- and you’re HIV-positive?

Coming out as HIV-positive... AGAIN

This article by Kristian Johns @guy_interruptd first appeared in FS Magazine, a publication of GMFA here.   “Do you suffer from any long-term medical conditions?” the piece of paper in front of me demanded. “Do you regularly take any medication?”  Innocent enough questions, but when it’s your first day on the job at a startup with no real HR department, those innocent questions can suddenly seem pretty loaded. Diabetic? Oh, poor you. Do you need to store insulin in the fridge?

Manners maketh the HIV man

published: September, 09, 2013 Categories // Dating, Social Media, Gay Men, Lifestyle, Living with HIV, Opinion Pieces, Population Specific

Dave R: In the rush to socially interact like never before, it’s clear that some LGBT people have forgotten their manners along the way. People with HIV can be further stigmatised by unnecessary rudeness and thoughtlessness

Manners maketh the HIV man

“HIGGINS. The great secret, Eliza, is not having bad manners or good manners or any other particular sort of manners, but having the same manner for all human souls: in short, behaving as if you were in Heaven, where there are no third-class carriages, and one soul is as good as another.”  ― George Bernard Shaw, Pygmalion I don’t have a giant chip on my shoulder, honestly I don’t, but I can’t get over how differently my gay peers treat me as a man with HIV. I’m not talking a

Profiling hooking up online

published: August, 28, 2013 Written by // Bob Leahy - Publisher Categories // Gay Men, Sexual Health, Health, Living with HIV, Opinion Pieces, Population Specific , Sex and Sexuality , Bob Leahy - Publisher

Bob Leahy examines how gay men on popular hook up sites like Squirt and BBRT use their profiles to disclose their status, serosort or otherwise negotiate what they want online and how that can often contribute to harm reduction - but not always.

Profiling hooking up online

How much do we know about disclosure on the internet?  Not much if we look for published research on how guys communicate for sex in 2013 or how frequently they reveal their HIV-status in a meaningful way or even how guys use their profiles to get what they are looking for. And how often does reliance on the efficacy of profiles put negative guys at risk? We just don’t know. But in an age where HIV researchers have seemingly studied virtually everything that moves, the most popular way i

HIV,disclosure and trust

published: July, 25, 2013 Written by // Wayne Bristow - Positive Life Categories // Dating, Gay Men, Lifestyle, Living with HIV, Opinion Pieces, Population Specific , Wayne Bristow

Wayne Bristow has been bitten before and as a result, he says, he has trust issues. Disclosure doesn’t always work well but he isn’t going to rule out dating negative gay men.

HIV,disclosure and trust

“We don’t choose the person who falls in love with us, they do, but we do have to trust them and ourselves.” When I was first diagnosed, and after I had a chance to say to myself, “I’m positive”, I thought  about who could I safely tell. I knew there were many reasons not to tell, but I felt I could trust some of my friends.  So I selected a few of them to tell because I had been struggling in the dating department and now my diagnosis was going to have a huge impact on how I ap

Thanks for disclosing - but breakfast is no longer included

published: July, 24, 2013 Written by // Guest Authors - Revolving Door Categories // Dating, Gay Men, Sexual Health, Health, Revolving Door, Lifestyle, Guest Authors, Living with HIV, Population Specific , Sex and Sexuality

The trials and tribulations of dating negative gay men. Guest writer George’s disclosure of his HIV-positive status results in the classic brush-off.

 Thanks for disclosing  - but breakfast is no longer included

While logged in to one of the popular apps, I was messaged by someone.  I will call him Dr. George. This guy fit my general tastes, so I decided to engage him. The exchange was unusual, in that it was not to the point and sexual as most chats on the apps are, but surprisingly polite, kind, and cordial. In his initial message all he told me was that he was coming to Montreal for a conference and wanted to meet me to say hello. I responded that I hoped it would be more than just a hello and he

Chatty CATIE: Mind your bedside manners

published: July, 09, 2013 Written by // CATIE - HIV and Hep C Info Resource Categories // CATIE, CATIE - HIV and Hep C Info Resource, Health, Living with HIV

From CATIE’s The Positive Side come stories of kindness, compassion and crossing the line during the hospital stays and medical visits of poz men and women

Chatty CATIE: Mind your bedside manners

These interviews by RonniLyn Pustil  were first published on the Positive Side here. Une version française est disponible ici.  Charles Dawson, 62 Charlottetown, PEI,  Retired,  HIV+ since: 1995  Last November I had to go to the hospital. The ambulance picked me up and when I got in, the paramedic’s first question was: “How did you contract HIV?” I was in a lot of pain at the time and it caught me by surprise. I just looked him and said: “I don’t think it’s any of your

My ex-boyfriend just announced on Facebook that he’s HIV-positive

published: June, 28, 2013 Categories // Dating, Women, Sexual Health, Health, Revolving Door, Lifestyle, Guest Authors, Population Specific

Guest Emily Heist Moss shares what goes through your mind when you find out your ex is HIV-positive (and you're negatiive).

My ex-boyfriend just announced on Facebook that he’s HIV-positive

This article previously appeared on the website Role/Reboot here.  An email arrives from an old friend with the name of your ex-boyfriend in the subject line.  In the body of the email, just this: “I'm totally shocked. When was the last time you talked to him?” You sigh, what now? Is he getting married? Having a baby? You head to Facebook, the one-stop shop for dirt on old flames. No wedding announcement, no ultrasound. Instead, there’s a video. Same crooked grin, same floppy hair, an

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