Sex and Sexuality

Telling Him I’m Positive

published: June, 21, 2012 Categories // Dating, Gay Men, Lifestyle, Living with HIV, Opinion Pieces, Population Specific , Sex and Sexuality

MT O’Shaughnessy: “So as I kissed this man I confronted one of my bigger boogie-men and took a moment to lean back. Look at him. And despite only having exchanged a few random kisses, told him I’m poz.”

There is an interesting convergence of issues in this moment, I think as I run my hand along the back of a man’s neck and pull him in for a second kiss.  But then.  Almost every kiss is a coalescing of stories into a lovely experience of timelessness.  Or at least, it is if you’re doing it right.  And even if one of those stories happens to be “I saw him five minutes ago across the bar in something sexy”.  Specifically? I was flashing through the last few years of my life.  Due

Mirvan’s story: The Uninvited Guest

published: June, 21, 2012 Categories // Gay Men, Youth, Newly Diagnosed, International , Living with HIV, Population Specific , Sex and Sexuality

New writer Mirvan Ereon lives in the Phillipines. He is 21. He was diganozed in February 2012 with a CD4 count of just 2. Here is his story.

 Mirvan’s story: The Uninvited Guest

The Sex I was a freshman in college when I started sleeping around.  I was reckless and unsafe and did not make an effort to take care of myself. All I ever cared about was to be a hedonist. I slept around, indulged in debauchery and celebrated in my decadence. I was young, wild and free. I thought I was liberating myself, unshackled by the norms of society. I am the captain of my own ship. I thought my personal freedom would make me stronger. I thought it would make me more desirable. I me

Twitter Hater

published: June, 19, 2012 Categories // Sex and Sexuality

The emotional dung thrown at us. Wes Austin with a remarkable post about a hate message directed at him from his twitter feed - and how he responded.

“…Love is better than anger. Hope is better than fear. Optimism is better than despair. So let us be loving, hopeful and optimistic. And we’ll change the world.…” The Honourable Jack Layton. I had my first ever troll engage with me the other day on my twitter feed.  This person was full of vitriol and hatred, calling me a freak and consigning me to hell and damnation. We sparred back and forth some on twitter, him (I’m presuming male here) ranting and raving about the aforementio

The Crystal Meth Connection of the Gay Porn Killer

published: June, 14, 2012 Written by // Mark S. King - My Fabulous Disease Categories // Gay Men, Current Affairs, Opinion Pieces, Population Specific , Sex and Sexuality , Mark S. King

A shockingly honest post from Mark S. King who draws the dots between Canadian accused killer Luka Magnotta, Mark’s own struggle with crystal meth addiction and the very dark places it can take you to.

The Crystal Meth Connection of the Gay Porn Killer

I knew it. I felt it. It was as clear as the incessant call of crystal meth itself, on those nights when a seductive phantom of the drug cozies up to me in bed and brings its knitting. In a Huffington Post news article on accused killer Luka Rocco Magnotta, buried in the story pages deep, a former lover says that the alleged murderer used methamphetamine, the drug popular among gay men that has claimed years of my life and left countless men in utter wreckage. The story of the Canadian “lo

Belt AND Suspenders?

published: June, 12, 2012 Categories // As Prevention , Health, Treatment, Living with HIV, Sex and Sexuality

Treatment as prevention inevitably raises the issue of how much protection is enough. Ken Monteith says “there are governments in this country who would like the rule to be disclosure, undetectable viral load AND condom.”

Belt AND Suspenders?

In 2008, the Swiss Federal Commission for HIV/AIDS issued a statement, distilled from an extensive literature review and much discussion, that can be summarized as follows: "An HIV-infected person on antiretroviral therapy with completely suppressed viraemia (“effective ART”) is not sexually infectious, i.e. cannot transmit HIV through sexual contact." This, as long as the person continues to follow effective anti-retroviral therapy, regularly evaluated by a physician, has maintained a s

The New Frontier

published: June, 09, 2012 Written by // Guest Authors - Revolving Door Categories // As Prevention , Gay Men, Health, Revolving Door, Treatment, Guest Authors, Opinion Pieces, Population Specific , Sex and Sexuality

The case for new solutions. “HIV prevention, like most American entities, has failed to adopt tactics that are sustainable in the long term to keep people uninfected” says this PrEP user

The New Frontier

This article was first published in My PrEP Experience, formerly a project of Chicago’s LifeLube.  My PrEP Experience  is a site featuring real stories submitted by people who have chosen to use PrEP as one way to protect themselves from HIV. Republished with permission. by anon, San Franciso [name withheld for now] "Prevention, PrEP, the whole damn thing — it all boils down to the human impulse to have sex without condoms. Thirty years into an epidemic, that’s still hard to talk ab

The First

published: June, 07, 2012 Categories // Dating, Gay Men, Lifestyle, Living with HIV, Population Specific , Sex and Sexuality

Positively Dating remembers. “You know, the boy that broke your heart so bad and no matter how many evil things he might have done, you still remember him fondly.”

The First

Ah, the First. No, I am not referring to the final foe of Ms. Buffy Summers. Even though this particular First can cause as much carnage and mayhem as The First Evil, I am referring to the First Love.  You know, the boy that broke your heart so bad and no matter how many evil things he might have done, you still remember him fondly. And even though I wasn’t meant to spend the rest of my life with, I am somehow cosmically connected to. Yes. That First.  He wasn’t the first guy I dated. T

TowelTalk: Inside Toronto’s Bathhouses

published: June, 05, 2012 Written by // John McCullagh - Publisher emeritus Categories // Gay Men, Mental Health, Features and Interviews, Health, Sexual Health, Population Specific , Sex and Sexuality , John McCullagh

John McCullagh talks with Marco Posadas about TowelTalk, a bathhouse counselling program that seeks to address the psychosocial issues that have an impact on HIV risk for gay and bisexual men and other men who have sex with men.

TowelTalk: Inside Toronto’s Bathhouses

For many years, outreach workers and volunteers from community-based organizations have worked with bathhouses to provide HIV and STI awareness, prevention and education services to bathhouse patrons. ACT, a Toronto ASO, has augmented these sexual health promotion activities through TowelTalk. This innovative program offers brief, walk-in counselling sessions in the bathhouse by professionally trained counsellors. The objective is to address the psychosocial issues that can have an i

Not all posts are happy posts . .

published: June, 05, 2012 Categories // Health, Sexual Health, Sex and Sexuality

Wes Austin shares “I feel like I have no face-to-face support system who truly understands what kind of an undertaking transition really is.”

I wanted to write a post that was light, and humorous and full of good cheer.  I was looking forward to highlighting some of the awesome things that have been happening recently. I planned to get my post in on time. I had the best of intentions and, as most things built with only intentions, they have failed miserably. Instead, I’d like to tell you about the last couple of weeks and how it’s affected me.  Two weeks ago, I headed down to see my cardiologist in Hamilton. I was born with a

Views from the front lines: Pre-exposure prophylaxis

published: June, 01, 2012 Written by // Guest Authors - Revolving Door Categories // CATIE, Health, Sexual Health, Treatment, Revolving Door, Guest Authors, Opinion Pieces, Sex and Sexuality

CATIE asked four people who work within the HIV community to give their pesrpectuves on Pre-exposure Prophylaxis (PrEP).

Views from the front lines: Pre-exposure prophylaxis

This article first appeared in Prevention in Focus , Spring 2011 edition, a publication of CATIE.  Une version française est disponible ici.  We spoke to four people with very different perspectives on PrEP. Dr. Mark Tyndall—Professor of Medicine, University of Ottawa Dr. Peter A. Newman—Associate Professor, Faculty of Social Work, University of Toronto Canada Research Chair in Health and Social Justice Jody Jollimore—Program Manager, Health Initiative for Men, Vancouver, Brit

Bareback Sex: What you need to know

published: May, 14, 2012 Written by // Bob Leahy - Publisher Categories // Gay Men, Health, Sexual Health, Population Specific , Sex and Sexuality , Bob Leahy - Publisher

The AIDS Committee of Toronto makes it clear they encourage men to practice safer sex. But they also understand there are other ways that guys can reduce their risk. ACT’s harm reduction guidelines for men who bareback are an example of addressing that.

Bareback Sex: What you need to know

To be truthful we on this website have tended to shy away from providing much coverage of barebacking in the past.  It just seemed too controversial, too likely to be construed as endorsing the practice, too – well, risky. But there’s no denying that men do have condomless sex – some regularly, some not - so it eventually seemed entirely realistic in our coverage of all things HIV to both give them a voice and dissect the practice. That is why we were happy to feature

Gay, Bisexual and MSM Trans Guys: No Assumptions!

published: May, 11, 2012 Written by // Guest Authors - Revolving Door Categories // Health, Sexual Health, Revolving Door, Guest Authors, Sex and Sexuality

What do we know about trans guys, their sexual attractions and how we should address their sexual health needs? A study conducted for theTrans Pulse project helps us understand more, in particular about trans men who identify as having sex with men.

Gay, Bisexual and MSM Trans Guys: No Assumptions!

This article is based on a report by Greta Bauer, Nick Redman and Kaitlin Bradley for the Trans PULSE team. E-Bulletins, presentations and articles available at To contact Trans PULSE: This email address is being protected from spambots. You need JavaScript enabled to view it. document.getElementById('cloakfbdfb2ce8c673734299c75a2a7998b42').innerHTML = ''; var prefix = 'ma' + 'il' + 'to'; var path = 'hr' + 'ef' + '='; var addyfbdfb2ce8c67

On becoming a man

published: May, 08, 2012 Categories // Sex and Sexuality

Wes Austin: “I want to tell you that I lived happily ever after in my new tranny identity and it was all smooth sailing. If I told you any of that however, I’d be lying through my teeth.

I wrote this piece for my own blog last June. As I review and expand on it I realize that at its core, it is still as true today as it was when I originally wrote it, in fact even more so. What prompted me to write this post was hearing my father’s diagnosis of prostate cancer. I had already been thinking of writing a post dealing with grief. However after hearing about my father’s health, I was overwhelmed with fear, sadness and anxiety about what his future held. Writing this at that ti

Scott Foley goes to Totally Outright in Toronto

published: May, 03, 2012 Categories // Activism, Gay Men, Population Specific , Sex and Sexuality

Scott Foley says “I recently had the pleasure of being part of the Aids Committee of Toronto’s (ACT) very first Totally Outright Group- a leadership workshop series for young gay and bi guys interested in being healthy, sex-savvy trendsetters.”

I first heard about this group from publisher John McCullagh in a post he wrote, which you can read here, where he interviewed Jody Jollimore, the program manager at the Health Initiative for Men (HIM), a gay men’s health organization in Vancouver, and Rui Pires, Gay Men’s Community Education Coordinator at AIDS Committee of Toronto (ACT). Both leaders described it as a leadership program for young gay men where we can learn about love, life, sexuality, sexual health and h

Safer Sex for Seniors

published: April, 30, 2012 Written by // Bob Leahy - Publisher Categories // Health, Sexual Health, Sex and Sexuality , Bob Leahy - Publisher

Bob Leahy looks at the rise in STI infections in the over-50 set, a website promoting safer sex for seniors and a video that features sexed-up seniors doing the nasty.

Safer Sex for Seniors

Who says senior years mean an end to sex?.  Studies have shown shown that more than 80% of 50-90 year olds are sexually active.  But for the same age group, sexually transmitted infection rates have doubled in the past decade in Canada, the U.S. and the U.K., says a recent study. According to a CTV News story, there has also been a significant increase in the number of older adults accessing HIV care, up 82 per cent since 2001. While much of that increase is due to HIV patients

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