Opinion Pieces

A Waste of Time, or Time Well Wasted

published: April, 18, 2011 Categories // Opinion Pieces

Rob Newman talks about letting go of old relationships when they no longer contribute to your own self-care

Through the wonders of social networking I was “found” a few weeby an old friend of mine. We hadn’t spoken in 5 years, and I will own that. I had moved, dropped my home phone kept my cell and returned to school. I imagine it was not easy to find me. I certainly wasn’t hiding; there were no bill collectors or crazy ex partners. Still I had no desire to connect or re-connect with this person. I was angry with him and instead of saying something; I said nothing for almost six years, and n

Sticks and stones may break my bones, but words will never hurt me

published: April, 15, 2011 Categories // Opinion Pieces

Danny Miller writes about how words can hurt, especially when we can no longer take them back

I always say I have no regrets in my life, but that is a lie, I actually have two, and they are big ones. The last conversation I had with my brother before he died was a stupid argument over a minor fender bender car accident. We ended the conversation with “well F%&k you too!!” And that was the last time I saw my brother alive. The last thing I said to my best friend in the entire world was “F YOU!” The morning my husband had two seizures that rendered him catatonic and eventuall

Putting “people” first

published: April, 11, 2011 Categories // Opinion Pieces

Megan DePutter continues her exploration of terminolgy and how best to call each other

Putting “people” first

In my last post , I discussed the term participant versus client. The other thing you may have heard discussed lately, if you’re an avid conference goer, is the issue of using “PHA” in workshops and presentations. On multiple occasions I have heard people who are living with HIV & AIDS argue that the term PHA should not be tossed around as often as it is. And I agree. Acronyms can make sense in certain context, like in a clinical sense, or in research, or grant proposals, but can be

Funny Prevention Messages from Europe, Part One – Sex is No Accident

published: April, 09, 2011 Written by // Bob Leahy - Publisher Categories // Opinion Pieces, Bob Leahy - Publisher

Looking at a funny and innovative HIV prevention campaign from Germany. But how effective is it?

Funny Prevention Messages from Europe, Part One – Sex is No Accident

Some ligh/lite fare today, but light fare that’s designed to make us think. Sex is No Accident – Always Use a Condom is a clever and funny prevention campaign coming from MTV Germany. I haven’t seen much criticism of this campaign. People seem to like it, judging by the Facebook thumbs-ups wherever it’s been featured on-line. And I must admit my initial reaction was good, because – well, it’s fresh and it’s funny, and that counts a lot. But how effective will it be? There are two

Vauxhall by Daylight: Sex and Drugs, no Rock 'n Roll

published: April, 08, 2011 Categories // Guest Authors, Opinion Pieces

U.K. Guest writer Viral Load Warrior turns the spotlight on London’s alternative gay village, the sex and drugs scene it has become known for – and the consequences.

‘Vauxhall by daylight! A porter-pot without porter! The House of Commons without the Speaker, a gas-lamp without the gas—poo, nonsense, the thing was not to be thought of’ Charles Dickens, Vauxhall Gardens by Day Vauxhall is nestled near the Thames in South London. The area is nothing special to look at, consisting of a transport hub, sprawling roads, disused railway arches, businesses and warehouses. At night, however, Vauxhall becomes an entirely different place. In the above quote, Di

Rules, Rules Everywhere

published: April, 08, 2011 Categories // Dating, Opinion Pieces

Ken Monteith on stuff like the first date rule - if we don’t have sex on the first date, there won’t be a second one – and other rules to live by.

Rules, Rules Everywhere

We had a very interesting and entertaining conversation at the lunch table at work today. Now we usually do have interesting conversations and often rather racy, too. Today’s was a perfect illustration of why it is so very important — and entertaining — to have diversity in your workplace. It started out with the three date rule. Apparently it is common for straight people to wait until the third date before they have sex. Earlier, and you’re a whore, later and you’re frigid. I assum

Assimilation in the Land of Cows - Part One

published: April, 07, 2011 Categories // Opinion Pieces, Bob Leahy - Publisher

Bob Leahy and a photo-essay on being out as a gay and poz man in the country and the role of HIV/AIDS activism in rural settings

Assimilation in the Land of Cows - Part One

There are many defining moments that occur when one first moves to the country. The first and perhaps most defining of all is when the empty moving van pulls out of your gravelly rural driveway. It has just deposited all your worldly possessions in to what smells, looks and feels like a distant outpost in another world. It is a moment of second guessing (was this idea really so smart?), self doubt and above all, finality. The second defining moment comes next day when you realize that your new

4 Pills Once Daily: Andrew Gayed’s Body Of Art

published: April, 07, 2011 Categories // Activism, Art, Arts and Entertainment, Treatment, Living with HIV, Opinion Pieces

Michael Burtch bares all - includes a NSFW link

Last month artist Andrew Gayed approached me about participating in a project addressing HIV-stigma and sex-positivity. Andrew’s goal was to explore HIV as something greater then a medical diagnoses, to look at how sex-negativity helped contribute to increasing HIV rates, and to examine the societal stigmatization of HIV positive people. The outcome of our two hour recorded interview and two hour long photo shoot has emerged, and it’s now available to view here. (A warning: this

Name games: participant versus client

published: April, 06, 2011 Categories // Opinion Pieces

Megan Deputter asks some probing questions about what we call the people that wallk though the doors of an AIDS Service Organization looking for help.

Name games: participant versus client

Participant. People who access our services. People who use our services. If you’ve attended any conferences lately, chances are you’ve heard any number of these words used by service providers. You may have noticed that these words are rapidly replacing the usage of the term “client”. I’ve heard a ton of discussion lately surrounding what kind of terminology can and should be used. Generally speaking I think that ASOs aim to create empowering environments, where everyone feels respe

Losses and Gains

published: April, 04, 2011 Categories // Living with HIV, Opinion Pieces

Montrealer Ken Monteith suggests you don’t have to become HIV-positive to improve your lot in life, but sometimes it actually helps.

Losses and Gains

This week marks an anniversary of sorts for me. Ten years since I made the decision to resign from the Bar and let go of that official status that I spent so much time and effort acquiring and maintaining. Not an easy decision, but one probably made more inevitable by my HIV status and my own expectations about my longevity and my immediate future. Chalk that one up as a loss. Now I don’t consider myself to be a particularly spiritual person, but we in the AIDS movement often talk about (or

Lady Gaga & the F-Word

published: March, 31, 2011 Categories // Opinion Pieces

“Just as many gay men have rejected Gaga as a their spokesperson, I too would like to reject Gaga as a spokesperson for women’s rights, social justice, HIV & AIDS, or just about anything else she knows nothing about.”

Lady Gaga & the F-Word

There has already been a whole heap of discussion on whether Gaga is a source of support for young gay youth and a champion for HIV & AIDS  or whether she is a corporate marketing pawn, perpetuating colonial attitudes and patronizing gay men. What’s been absent from the discussion, though, is the hypocrisy that Gaga has shown when it comes to promoting women’s rights. I watched her interview on Good Morning America via poz.com , where she claims to be an advocate for women living

Competing Agendas only Hurt those who are HIV positive

published: March, 30, 2011 Written by // Brian Finch - Founder Categories // Opinion Pieces, Brian Finch

This leads me to the rhetorical question: What happened to the patient?

Competing Agendas only Hurt those who are HIV positive

I was all set to write up a “The Coles Notes: Treatment edition” having reading an article entitled, “Test and Treat”: Is It Enough? when I thought, “I’m going to write about what I think about all of this. Essentially “test and treat” is part of the use of anti-retrovirals as a form of prevention by lowering the amount of HIV found in the blood. Dutch researcher Joep M.A. Lange suggest that we need to get out there and treat the newly diagnosed, but as the title suggests, in h

Are YOU over it?

published: March, 28, 2011 Categories // Opinion Pieces, Bob Leahy - Publisher

Bob Leahy looks at the Post-AIDs phenomenon of the 1990’s, whether it is still alive and kicking and whether he, or anyone, still buys in to that notion that we are living in a Post-AIDS era

Are YOU over it?

I don’t think we’ve ever talked about being in a Post-AIDS era here before, even though that term has probably more relevance today than when people first started using it.  That was around 1996. The recently diagnosed may not even recognize the term, so here's a little history. The term "Post AIDS" seems to have first seen the light of day not long after protease inhibitors became generally available. The 1996 International AIDS Conference in Vancouver has in fact gained some notorie

In Praise of HIV Negative Gay Men!

published: March, 23, 2011 Written by // Mark S. King - My Fabulous Disease Categories // Gay Men, Opinion Pieces, Sex and Sexuality , Mark S. King

Mark S King says : In the anxious world of sexuality and HIV risk, we could all use a little love and support. So, in the spirit of everyone getting the attention they deserve, allow me a moment to throw a party for HIV negative gay men.

In Praise of HIV Negative Gay Men!

HIV negative gay men hear a lot about what they should be doing (or not doing), but rarely about what they are doing well. They have had to plod along, making the best choices they could to remain negative, fearing every blood test, and often watching friends become infected with HIV. Clearly, HIV positive people are subjected to daily stigmatization and prejudice, from the workplace to the dating pool. But this isn’t a contest. Considering this blog site is devoted to living joyfully with H

Unwanted same-sex attraction? There WAS an app for that - Updated March 22, 2011

published: March, 22, 2011 Written by // Bob Leahy - Publisher Categories // Opinion Pieces, Bob Leahy - Publisher

Bob Leahy drank the Kool-aid and tried out the ex-gay movement’s controversial new iPhone app. Hows that for dedication?

Unwanted same-sex attraction? There WAS an app for that - Updated March 22, 2011

Obviiously this was written before it was learned that the Exodus app is no longer available on the iTunes store.  Clearly my review was responsible for that removal, LOL. Now I should review the pesky Harper government and see what happpens.  ***************************************************  What I do for PositiveLIte.com.   A few weeks ago I spent $1.99 to review  that crummy Confession - A Roman Catholic app. Which yuk-inducing app, I might add, was imm

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