Totally outRIGHT is a sexual health leadership program for young gay/bi/queer guys who are 18 – 26 years old.

The program is designed by young men and for young men who are from a diversity of ethno-specific backgrounds, trans identities or HIV statuses and interested in becoming healthy, smart and sexy trendsetters in Toronto.

If you’re older than 26 but younger than 30 and interested in coming give us a call! We might be able to fit you in! 

Totally outRIGHT is being organized by the AIDS Committee of Toronto (ACT) over a series of four all-day sessions on Saturdays, June 2, 9, 16 and 23.

 Attendance is free!  

 Get on the list!  We take care of the rest!

 Register by Monday, May 14, 2012.

Contact: Rui Pires, Gay Men's Community Education Coordinator  

416-340-8484 ext. 264

For More Info on Totally outRIGHT:

Presentations: We might be able to go out and talk to your group! Drop Sean Uyeda our Peer Facilitator a line at his email: This email address is being protected from spambots. You need JavaScript enabled to view it.

Email: This email address is being protected from spambots. You need JavaScript enabled to view it. .

Our Web Site: http://www.actoronto.org/to 

What past participants are saying:

About the Program:

"I am so happy I have attended this program. I have felt so comfortable and accepted in this group." 

"I found it very hard to select an “issue in the community” for this project, as I didn’t feel like I was really part of the gay community (it’s hard to pick a community issue for a community you are unconnected to). But I feel more encouraged to stay connected to the community now, and working with a group helped me to come up with a topic I felt passionate about." 

"Gay men AMEN! Thank the highest heavens for giving us the courage to push boundaries and create our own unique, fascinating worlds that facilitates the creation of beautiful relationships of all kinds."

About the Speakers:

"Great community and excellent speakers." 

"LOVED this presentation. Great to know that something like this exists for the LGBT community." 

"His recount of the historic events was absolutely riveting and breathtaking! THANK YOU for such a wonderful opportunity to partake in learning such valuable history."  

I first heard about this group from PositiveLite.com publisher John McCullagh in a post he wrote, which you can read here, where he interviewed Jody Jollimore, the program manager at the Health Initiative for Men (HIM), a gay men’s health organization in Vancouver, and Rui Pires, Gay Men’s Community Education Coordinator at AIDS Committee of Toronto (ACT). Both leaders described it as a leadership program for young gay men where we can learn about love, life, sexuality, sexual health and how we can apply this knowledge in our community.     

Intriguing, I thought, so I might as well register. I soon received an email advising me of the program schedule. We were set to meet for four full-day Saturday sessions. I wasn’t too sure about giving up my Saturdays for four consecutive weeks but I figured that I should check it out and see how I felt after the first session. 

Not knowing what to expect, I approached the first session with a hint of caution. The lay out of the room was well done and I was greeted warmly by the facilitator Rui Pires. I was overcome with a bout of absolute shyness at first as we went around the table giving brief introductions about ourselves and what we hoped to get out of the group. I was pleasantly surprised to hear that I wasn’t the only one hoping to learn how to connect with other gay guys outside of the bar setting with no pressure to get sexual. 

After our intro’s Rui told us a bit about himself and the work he has done with the gay/HIV community. It was safe to assume that we were in good hands. We then launched into an interactive workshop on coming out. We gathered around the room in the order of who was out the longest and we each shared a little about our coming out process. This exercise was enlightening and the stories were amazingly diverse.  Rui then gave some tips on coming out and being supportive to others who are coming or thinking of coming out. 

Throughout the duration of the program we had the opportunity of hearing from various community leaders ranging from health and mental health professionals to community activists. We also got to learn about the dynamics of different types of gay relationships. And there are quite a few that I wasn’t aware of! We got first hand testimony about the importance of getting involved in different aspects of the community, like the fight against HIV. We even had a crash course on flirting and cursing! 

So without giving too much away about the program, I would strongly recommend it to anyone between the ages of 18-26 who wants to learn about the gay community and the issues that affect us, as well as develop great communication and leadership skills. Above all it’s a safe space where guys can come to have fun and engage in conversations on a variety of topics that affect us today.

The next session of Totally Outright takes place in June. For more information, you can visit www.actoronto.org/to or you can contact Rui Pires at This email address is being protected from spambots. You need JavaScript enabled to view it.

To continue where I left off in part 9 of my story, which you can read here, the decision was made to seek to remain in Canada as a Conventional Refugee, thanks to the information shared with me by the man I had fallen for during (Toronto) Pride 2011.

I returned home and began to discreetly wrap things up, all the while maintaining contact with the list of references provided to me by my new boyfriend.  I reached out to folks at the 519 Church Street Community Centre and the Metropolitan Community Church  who in turn connected me with a great lawyer. The support I received from them was overwhelmingly positive, much like the support I received from my partner and unlike the negative feedback I received from my gay relative here in Canada. One of his opinions was that people from our country “don’t succeed” with such claims. But despite his negativity, I decided to proceed.

In less than a month I returned to Toronto. I was scared shitless but optimistic at the same time. Here I was making a break for it from the years of bullshit and turning a new yet uncertain page of my life. I didn’t know what to expect. A few days after I arrived, I formally made the claim at the Citizenship and Immigration Canada (CIC)   office. It was a two-part process that included having to be interviewed by an immigration officer to ensure that I met the requirements. That in itself was terrifying, to say the least. I then had to complete a medical exam in which the results would determine if I’d be eligible to work while I wait for my refugee hearing.

Since the results of this exam would take a few months, I decided to use this time to tend to some much needed mental self care. I started by touching base with the program coordinators of the refugee support group, Amongst Friends, at the 519 and by way of referral from the very support doctor that performed my medical exam, I went to an HIV specialist. After all, I had no clue what was going on with me medically. I then enrolled in an excellent program by the AIDS Committee of Toronto (ACT) geared specifically to HIV positive gay men - Gay Poz Sex (GPS). Joining this program was one of the best decisions I’ve ever made. It literally gave me the tools needed to start unpacking the side effects of the homophobia I faced. It also gave me some much needed practical Canadian HIV 101. Like the fact that I must disclose my status to anyone I wanted to have sex with prior to doing so. (Editor's note – where there is a “significant risk” of transmission.) This law doesn’t exist at home. In fact if I disclose my status, I’d probably have my ass kicked, among other things.

The more I learned about the HIV community/movement, the more I felt the need to get involved. I then started volunteering for ACT and, from a connection made through the GPS group, I was given the opportunity to have a voice through PositiveLite.com. Apart from my new activism stripe, I continue to meet with the facilitator of the GPS program after it wrapped up to continue unpacking my mental issues. These private sessions are a now weekly part of my life.

On the social side of things, I’ve been slowly starting to come into my real self. I now love all things gay. It’s a bit difficult to go from closet case to gay and proud but I’m working on it. Like anyone my age, I enjoy hitting the bars/clubs in the village from time to time and checking out the eye candy in the Church-Wellesley village. I’m still navigating my way through the maze of making friends but I do have a few genuine guy friends for which I’m more than thankful.

Though I’ve been finding ways to occupy myself, I still have the ‘what if’s’ thoughts that causes a panic. Like what if things don’t go well and I have to return home? It’s inevitable for anyone in my shoes not to have these thoughts but thanks in great part to ongoing counselling and the support from those around me, I’m slowly learning to counter those negative thoughts with positive ones.

I was lucky enough that after I received my work permit earlier this year I was able to find full-time employment in a field that I’m familiar with. Through my volunteer duties and participation in different LGBT support programs, I was able to see that you actually can live a normal life with HIV. With that in mind, I’m planning to finally pursue my educational and career-related goals. I gave up on them after my diagnosis but I’m ready to move forward with my life. I’m more than just HIV positive.

Within a few short months, I’ve been able to accomplish things that I never would have thought possible if I were still in my country. I’ve been able to put a totally different spin on my life and possibly my future, if granted permission to remain in Canada. Though it’s daunting, and despite the difficult moments that come with being a refugee claimant, I’ve been able to see tremendous results from simply taking a stand.

This editorial by Rob Salerno first appeared in Xtra, Canada’s Gay and Lesbian News source, here.

Two weeks ago, I found myself at the Newmarket Health Centre, where Conservative MP Lois Brown was making an announcement of new funding for the AIDS Committee of York Region (ACYR).

It was a tastefully subdued affair. ACYR’s executive director, Radha Bhardwaj, gave a speech outlining the accomplishments of her organization and some of the unique challenges of providing services for HIV-positive people in the sprawling region north of Toronto that’s home to more than one million people.

Brown spoke eloquently of her own relationship with HIV, forged when her mother, a retired nurse, saw the virus emerging in the region and decided to volunteer with patients many other health professionals refused to treat.

Brown then announced that the agency was receiving $162,400 over two years from the Public Health Agency of Canada’s (PHAC) AIDS Community Action Program (ACAP) to fund a “Community HIV Engagement Program,” which will “increase awareness and visibility of the impact of HIV/AIDS in the region and will improve individual, organizational and community-wide knowledge about HIV prevention and transmission,” according to a government press release.

The announcement noted that a big part of the new program will focus on engaging at-risk populations, including the homeless, drug users, youth and immigrant women. Notably absent from the press conference and briefings was any mention of gay men, who still make up the largest cohort of new HIV diagnoses.

But perhaps that’s not surprising. The epidemic is different in York Region than it is in Toronto, ACYR board chair Marnie Sigmar explained to me. More gay men live in the city or would feel more comfortable accessing services there. In York Region, which has the third-highest number of HIV cases in the GTA after Toronto and Peel, the clientele is noticeably more female and immigrant or ethnic minority.

Sigmar seemed very interested in attempting more outreach to gay men but confessed that she isn’t sure how to do that given there aren’t any gay bars or gay neighbourhoods in the region. She said ACYR would try to reach out on social networking sites and the internet.

Shortly before ACYR received its funding, the AIDS Committee of Toronto (ACT) found out it was losing the funding it had received for years from ACAP to run services for women and Portuguese-speakers.

PHAC had reworked the ACAP funding criteria to limit the number of programs a single agency could receive funding for, specifically to spread the money further outside of Toronto, where many older AIDS service organizations have run multiple programs for years.

Again, that shouldn’t be surprising. Toronto is home to 75 percent of Ontario’s 26,000 estimated HIV patients – almost 20,000 people. For comparison, ACYR estimates its client base in the low hundreds.

This isn’t to denigrate the good work ACYR does. Nor do I think it’s as simple as the Conservatives punishing gay downtown Torontonians for not voting Conservative and rewarding the tiny organizations in Tory-friendly suburban ridings — really, do you think HIV workers are a target Tory demo? Besides, the Tories have a third of Toronto’s ridings now, too.

The changing nature of the epidemic requires flexible and dynamic responses from our government and our service providers, and that can be provided only with stable and predictable long-term funding.

Instead, PHAC left agencies across Ontario dangling for months, then hastily issued a call for funding over the Christmas holidays, leaving organizations with little time to table serious new proposals.

I’m unconvinced that a province-wide wellness retreat for HIV-positive women or services for lusophones are the best use of limited public funding to fight HIV, but by keeping ASOs in the dark and limiting their number of applications, the government hobbled their ability to respond to the epidemic in new and better ways.

The result will likely be increased stresses on AIDS services in Toronto, decreased awareness in the epicentre of the crisis, and a resulting increase in the HIV caseload in Toronto.

PHAC and Health Minister Leona Aglukkaq should be ashamed.

See also Xtra’s other articles on this topic

• Federal cuts force ACT to cancel programs 

• Federal HIV/AIDS funding falls short 

(PositiveLite.com Editor’s note; This article mentions the cuts to ACT’s programming. The full extent of cuts to funding of other ASO’s in Toronto and across the country resulting from this last round of PHAC funding requests is not yet known. PHAC will not provide this information. This information is currently being gathered by the HIV community. PositiveLite.com will report this information as soon as it becomes available to us.) 

(left to right Keith Reynolds, Daniel McGraw, Darren Ho)

Earlier this year on PositiveLite.com, we profiled Totally Outright, a program for young gay men who show promise as future community leaders. Today, in a special series of articles by three graduates of the program, we hope to show how, by investing in these and similar young men, we’re able to ensure that the future of Canada’s gay community will be in good hands.

The uplifting stories of Daniel McGraw, Keith Reynolds and Darren Ho illustrate how, with a minimum of resources but with lots of creativity, it’s possible to create the gay leaders of tomorrow. But the program not only forms future leaders. It also provides participants with the chance to build communication skills, practice outreach techniques and strategize solutions for the numerous challenges faced by gay men.

All three of the young men who tell their stories on PositiveLite.com today have found a place in the gay community beyond the bars and clubs. Both Daniel and Keith now work in gay men’s health while Darren, a university student, has started a project to address the lack of visible presence of LGBTQ people among ethnic communities.

Totally Outright has been running in Vancouver for several years and graduates 20-25 young men annually. Created and evaluated by the Community Based Research Centre (CBRC), it’s delivered by Health Initiative for  Men (HiM), a community organization dedicated to strengthening the health and well-being of gay men through a sex-positive, integrated approach to health. The program has been so successful that a Toronto version was launched this spring by the AIDS Committee of Toronto (ACT). 

Read what Daniel, Keith and Darren have to say and be inspired!

If you are interested in starting a version of Totally Outright in your own community, or just want to understand this program in depth, Health Initiative for Men has provided full background information in CATIE’s Programming Connection.

There’s a new approach that’s taking place in HIV prevention and support programs, particularly those focused on gay men, that’s based on supporting us in maintaining good health, particularly good sexual health, by emphasizing our strengths and resilience rather than focusing on risk behaviours and pathologizing our weaknesses and vulnerabilities.

Here on PositiveLite.Com, we’ve featured several programs that utilize this new approach: It’s Hottest at the Start; The Sex You Want;  GPS (Gay Poz Sex); Spunk;  and Totally Outright. 

So I thought it was timely to learn more about the thinking behind this new approach and to understand more about the concepts of risk and resilience that underly it. To help me, I recently sat down with Duncan MacLachlan, the manager of community health programs at the AIDS Committee of Toronto (ACT). 

John McCullagh: Welcome back, Duncan, to PositiveLite.Com. I’d like to start by asking you to describe risk for me. When I think of risk, I usually think of things that could be dangerous, like smoking, for example, or drinking and driving. But it’s more complicated than that, isn’t it?

Duncan MacLachlan: Risk is complicated, John, because it always exists in a context.  It’s often oversimplified. Risk for gay men has, for the most part, been narrowly defined in terms of vulnerabilities. Things like HIV and other STI acquisition, or mental health, issues like depression and anxiety, or substance use. These vulnerabilities are real, of course. They exist because of things like stigmas, trauma and poverty, but they aren’t the whole story. Gay men know this. In the arena of sexual expression, we’re motivated by things like desire, pleasure, intimacy, connection and love not merely the fact that we may be challenged by anxiety or loneliness.

John: I hear you saying that risks don’t exist in a vacuum, they always have a context. That means, I guess, that we should be cautious when judging our own or someone else’s risk behaviours. And yet, that’s not the way, until recently, that we’ve done HIV prevention work. Instead, we’ve said, “This is what you should be doing” - like “Use a condom every time” - which was based on the theory that we’d all make rational choices when faced with risk.

Duncan: Exactly. We all know that our behaviour isn’t always rational. So this idea that we’re free to chose in every situation and that if we’re armed with information we’ll always make “good” decisions is false. Yet, while those of us doing prevention and education work with gay men have moved beyond this simplistic notion a long time ago, it still persists in society at large. It exists in our community as well; the demonizing of bareback sex is an example.

John: Duncan, how would you say we can best overcome the odds and challenges of the risks we face in our lives?

Duncan: Wow, John. That’s a big one! Here’s part of the answer. My studies of psychology teach me that it’s positive reinforcement rather than punishment that motivates us. Again, we all know this intuitively because we’ve experienced them both.  I’m a big believer in love and compassion, both at an individual level and a community level!

John: So tell me a bit about gay men’s resilience. It’s more than just coping isn’t it? 

Duncan: It is. As part of ACT’s current gay men’s resilience campaign, we asked guys what resilience meant to them. What they told us was that it meant bouncing back from a challenge and gaining some aspect of strength from the experience. I think sometimes resilience is coping, but, as you say, it’s often more then that. What’s really interesting is the notion of protective factors - characteristics that counter some of the challenges gay men face, like homophobia. Protective factors can be enhanced. An example Amy Herrick and others have identified in research is shamelessness or sexual creativity.  ACT’s Pig Sex Project (for gay guys who identify as “sex pigs” and who like to have raunchy sex. - Ed.) nurtures these protective factors by providing an environment where guys are affirmed and valued – our slogan is “It’s your choice” - rather than judged for their sexual expression. It’s also an environment where the guys share their strategies for risk reduction with each other because they feel safe to do so.

John: Can you give me some other examples of how we can build resilience.

Duncan: One of the most useful ways of considering the development of resilience programming, or evaluating existing programs and supports for their resilience effectiveness, is a model called the 7 C’s of resilience. These 7 C’s of resilience are: confidence, competence, character, contribution, coping, control, and connection.  People have better health outcomes and a higher quality of life when these things are nurtured and this can be easily measured. At ACT, we are using the 7 C’s of resilience to enhance our capacity to assess the effectiveness of our programming in building resilience.

John: So, Duncan, if I’ve understood you correctly, you’re talking about an asset-based approach to health, focusing on our strengths instead of our weaknesses, on our resilience instead of our deficiencies. That’s very different than talking about condoms, than talking about disease, isn’t it?

Duncan: Yes, although an asset based approach that is rooted in resilience doesn’t mean we don’t talk about condoms or disease. Using condoms might be an important part of many gay men’s resilience.

John: So give me an example of how focusing on our assets, on our strengths, correlates with reducing risk behaviours?

Duncan: Sure. Let’s talk about sex, sexual creativity for example, which is another of the protective factors identified in Amy Herrick’s research. More and more guys are talking about viral load with each other. We now know that having an undetectable viral load reduces risk of transmission. We’re not sure by how much, but it makes a difference. Our willingness to push the boundaries of sexual pleasure enables us to explore the utility of a great variety of cock and ball “accessories” that enhance our ability to stay hard, facilitating condom use.

John: Duncan, you’ve really helped me understand why building on our successes is ten-times more compelling than trying to build on our failures. Because we all want to be successful and healthy. Thank you so much.

Duncan: You’re welcome, John.

Reference: Herrick, A. et al. Resilience as an untapped resource in behavioral intervention design for gay men. AIDS Behav (2011) 15-S25-S29