Vegetarian or not.

I was on a subway recently with a friend and both headed Eastbound.  I was heading towards Donlands Station (editor’s note: in Toronto) – home of one of my favourite burger places – Square Boy.  I am not sure exactly what it is about their burgers that I enjoy so much.  Perhaps it’s the nostalgia.  The place has existed long before I was born and I have a vague recollection of my father taking me here as a child – since our family doctor’s office was just around the corner back then.  Perhaps I have an unconscious desire and attraction to older Greek men.  It’s completely possible.  Growing up in and around Greektown can do that to someone I suppose.  Have you even seen some of the statues of Zeus?  He’s a looker!  Ok sure he liked to get it on with people in various outfits and animal forms, but really he isn’t half bad.

I should mention though that I have never seen one of those statuesque forms here in the Square Boy though!  That’s part of the deal though, isn’t it?  It’s a greasy spoon – a food indulgent locale.  A place where one can just relax and be without consequence or judgement. Of course as I say this I think of the mid-30s man who works here with the light grey-coloured eyes who I catch myself gazing at too long and have to turn away, only to want to look back again a few seconds later.  The place is old.  It shows the wear of time.  So do the workers and many of the patrons.  Despite all of this, a part of me longs to return here.  I would love to judge this in some way, or explain that it’s awful and bad, or that I hardly ever do it.  But I love it. 

There is a belief that yogis - all yogis - for one reason or another are vegetarians.  Some are.  Some are vegan or raw-food vegans or will eat vegetables and eggs (since free-range chickens will lay eggs regardless).  Some do this out of religious/spiritual connotations, some out of moral or ethical reasons.  My personal take on this tends to come from the first of the eight components of yoga.  This being the Yamas – our attitude toward our environment.  I have chatted about a few already.  There are five yamas and the first one is Ahimsa.  Ahimsa has many translations but the one used more commonly is non-harming or non-violence.  It is through this avenue that many yogis believe that in order to move further down this path and be less harmful one must forgo eating meat. 

While this may work for many as a viable option, this may also be a daunting task for others.  I remember first learning about this almost 10 years ago at the beginning of this yoga journey and recalling how upset that made me.  For someone who can barely take care of themselves, keeping up with medications and doctors appointments and trying to eat around pill intakes was already a tough enough job, then radically shifting my diet in order to practice yoga and learn to meditate.  What I found was that these self-observances are essentially just that; things that work and/or may not work for each individual to decide.  Yogis are trying to live life in a reduction from harm both in cause and effect.  This may include the absence of meat.

Harm reduction in daily life

But non-harming is broader than this.  Where I think its greatest impact in the lives of us mere mortals is in judgement.  The words and phrases I use to communicate with you and about you are more devastating than the actions about which we talk about.  If yoga is truly about connection and drawing together and becoming more united and more whole, it cannot be accomplished at the sacrifice of my brothers and sisters.  Non-harming is first and foremost the number one practice a yogi begins.  It starts with self.  If there any actions, things in life going on right now that are causing you pain?  The way we work or sleep or play?  My suggestion would be to stop it.

It’s funny.  There is a pose I teach often called sleeping hero pose (Supta Virasana) that I warn students each time if there is any sharp pain in the ankles, knees or lower back, to back off from coming all the way down to the floor.  I have found various ways to say this over the years and many of my students laugh when I talk about it.  Each and every single class I have taught through the years though, there is one student who pushes themselves too far and ends up shooting right up out of the posture because they hurt themselves.  In yoga, if there is pain, there is no gain.  Yoga is about awareness.  And starting in our own bodies is a great beginning.

My words and thoughts have power (see article “Just two more Inches”).  How shall I use them today? Do I choose to destroy others with my thoughts and my words or do I choose to build them up?  Sometimes it’s justified, that to be completely open and honest one has to say some tough and mean things to people because they need to know the truth.  But I am reminded that, from a yogic perspective, Satya (truthfulness) comes second to Ahimsa – this means that it’s more important to not hurt someone’s feelings or burst their realities then it is to tell the truth.  As one of my spiritual guides likes to remind people, unsolicited advice is abuse.  And he’s right.  I do not have a place in telling someone else what is right or not right in their lives; nor does anyone else.   Each may choose for themselves based on their own path.  Not all will reach the same place in a path at the same time.  That’s the wonderful thing about journeys. 

After my first class of yoga I had a smoke (tasted amazing), grabbed some beer and ordered a meat-lover pizza and applauded myself for my wonderful commitment to practice.  Through the years as I became more aware of what worked for me and my life in those times and places, things changed.  Some things came and went and others came back in again and left.  It became a practice of what worked for me and what didn’t.  Of what is harming me and what wasn’t.  And so I say grab that burger for all you are worth and chow down!  I love them.  As funny as life is, of course, as this present time, the last burger I had tore through my body like nobody’s business.  And as I write this I pause and ponder if I need to make new changes in my life that will cause me less harm.  I hope you take the time out to do the same.  Namaste. 

 

I love that I am involved and connected into a radical group of people who believe in spiritual pursuits through physical movement and interconnection for greater peace, love, joy and freedom to all people – even our enemies.

Having said all that, I would also like to say we’re like a bag full of organic granola – filled with fruits, flakes and nuts!

Here is a copy of my top three current favourite yoga YouTube videos that I hope go viral cause they show the ridiculousness of me and my peers completely.

Number Three – Yoga Police

This is a clip taken from the television show Gravity which is about a group of people who are all suicide survivors.  This is the main scene from the second episode.  Saying too much will give it away.  Enjoy!

Number Two - Yoga Girl (shown below)

It’s a hilarious music video about a straight guy trying to hit on a yogini.  I have to say after seeing this and showing a good friend of mine, I told him never act like him.  For the record, I have seen men like this in class.  Too funny.

Number One - Shit Yogis Say (also shown below)

It’s another remake of that very popular title that is going around right now.  I have to admit that I have said several of these things, and not just once.  It’s a part of my daily life language.  Just the other day I was telling a friend and fellow teacher I was going to me late for lunch because the moon day caught me up and made me late.  I have a thirst for coconut water and my hips ARE so open right now.  But the most important line from all of this is:  You WANT to see where I can put my leg.

 

At the end of every year and start of a new one I become reminded of cleaning.  Perhaps it’s the holiday mess that accumulates because of going out more and/or having more company around the home.  I definitely am reminded of it when it comes to taking down the decorations – which for me is one long string of techno-Christmas lights weaved in and through my curtains that hang on my large one wall of windows.  More than that though, I become aware of how messy my closet and special junk drawer “space” have become. I have a table in my apartment that, upon entering the home, I come in and dump everything onto and then walk away.  Sometimes I am quick at transporting these things to alternative homes but many times I am not.  Eventually I have to get another bag or box to sweep everything from the table into it and put that in the closet so the table would be clean when company comes over with the intention of cleaning it up again, but never get to it and so in the closet it remains.  I have done that three times now.  Has this ever happened to you?

There is all the intention in the world to get this stuff put away but it gets to a point where we’re not exactly sure why specifically we are keeping these things to begin with.  At some point in our own histories they might have been treasured memories or pieces of significant achievement, but now they are sealed in bags and boxes like skeletons in coffins packing our closet to the point of overcrowding - especially when the clothes don’t actually fit inside anymore.  Or maybe, the clothes are part of the problem too!

Looking into the New Year is like viewing a new home from the front door of the old one - all the possibilities that new space and life can create are untapped potential.  Looking beyond the material, I remind myself of what has taken place this past year that can stay in 2011 and not journey with me to 2012.  A year is like a trip, or a move to a new home, not everything needs to come with you.  Some things you give away.  Some you sell off.  And some you simply discard.

Aparigraha is the absence of avarice.  It is the fifth Yama (self-observance) a yogi endeavours to live by - non-grasping.  It’s the open palm approach to life and living.  In some areas of life, it’s incredibly hard to do.  Is there anything in your life that you are white-knuckling through?  It’s a tough question to ask one’s self.  Is there unwanted material, physical, and/or meta-physical junk that has been acquired in our storage areas of existence that has you feeling crowded or blocked up inside?  Perhaps now is a great opportunity to let it go?

Sometimes seeing the extremes of why it’s important is helpful too.  Two characters of fiction come to mind – Gollum from Lord of the Rings and, since Michael Burtch is a fan of DC Comics, Larfleeze, who possesses the Orange Power Ring – which is fuelled by the emotion avarice. These extreme looks at characters depict individuals, though honestly good intentioned, have now become burdened with an insatiable hunger that can never be quelled.  Even in death, Golem is clutching his precious and cherishing it.  Larfleeze has horded everything to himself to the point that all his closest friends and allies are energy constructs of dead people.  People he’s killed.  Sounds like a happy life.

So maybe there is something to this letting go.  I try to look at this releasing process in several areas at once: material, physical, emotional, mental, and spiritual.  Start by cleaning out that space or place, or person that isn’t right for you anymore.  That ex you keep talking about, the job you hated that you’re no longer at.  It’s time to leave them and the old ideas surrounding them where they are.

My favourite song right now is Let it Go, by Carlos Gallardo and Peyton, one of the lyrics states, “You gotta let it go.  Close your eyes and you will see, you’re just a child playing God in a Universe of possibilities.”  And perhaps it’s true.

I have made a decision.  I am letting go of the idea that I am sick or unhealthy.  I am completely embracing the fact that I’m a fit and healthy person.  It’s not denying my status, but merely releasing the burden I have placed on it.  I’m opening up to the possibility of life.  I release the mental idea that there is only one way for me to live life – letting go of yoga – my practice and my profession.  Everything is packaged into little compartments that I rebel against it and live on this flip-flop imbalance of life.  I choose to allow spontaneity and creativity to have a say in my existence.  Life isn’t much fun for me without it.  And ofcourse, I’m opening the closet doors and facing those bags and boxes of whatever and letting them come out,  opening them up, looking in, and discarding what isn’t needed anymore.

 Perhaps it’s time to let go - to release the unwanted.  To open your hands wide and allow the winds of destiny to carry away that which is no longer needed and to make room for that which is to come.  Jai!

It’s crazy.  I know how it sounds.  Everything in life is about moving forward to get ahead.  Have to keep trying and pushing and fighting and struggling to make it.  Much effort is required to achieve victory – the win.  But sometimes, no matter how hard you fight and struggle and push, some things just don’t move forward.  They’re stuck.  You can’t figure it out and you try harder and exert more and try coming at it from different angles and still nothing.  Sometimes it’s just time to surrender.

It’s an awful thing - surrender.  It embodies a feeling of loss or defeat or that you’re openly admitting you’re a loser  - and now not trying is clearly letting others now just how much of a loser you truly are.

The image my mind always goes to is that of Tank Man, the unknown figure who stood in front of a line of tanks in Tiananmen Square.  The image gives me chills.  I can close my eyes and try to see what he saw.  Stand in his shoes and look down the barrel of on-coming tanks and think like Gandolf the Grey did.  No.  Here and no further.  Without a weapon or any defense.  The power of that gives me chills.

Perhaps we aren’t facing down a tank or surrendering our life in combat or starving ourselves for some purpose.  Here, just consider taking time to stop everything for a few minutes before continuing on your way.  I am reminded of watching dog trials on an obstacle course.  One of the great tricks they must master, besides jumping through hoops and running over a teeter-totter, is to sit down and be still in the middle of a race.  They even know that it’s a great talent and asset to stop for a moment, regroup and then come out again.  Isn’t that what half-time’s really about in sporting events?

Today is World AIDS Day.  Globally people are coming together to stand and speak up and out for 30 years of this disease.  It is fitting that today is also the first day of the One-Month Challenge of rest I wrote about earlier.  I had thought about doing something.  About putting something together and doing something impactful and profound but when it comes right down to it, there is only one thing I know how to do well – and that’s nothing at all.  Essentially it’s just another day – like any other day.

There is a sense of great honour that the World acknowledges this disease that my brothers and sisters past, present and future battle with.  But today on this day, I choose not to battle.  I choose to pause.  To “stand” and face my red-ribboned tank, close my eyes and surrender.  Just like every other day.  Jai!

 

How many times during the week do you find yourself having this debate?  Starving hungry you find yourself with two food options.  One is the bag of chocolate covered almonds (you can extrapolate this to any food with whom you share a bond) and the other is Greek salad.

Before you can figure out which one you think you should eat, you’ve already had six of the almonds.  So then you say to yourself that you can probably eat the salad afterwards but you already started on the almonds so you should stick with them and might as well finish the bag. So you do.  Then you turn to  the salad and see that some of the leaves have started wilting and you’re kind of full already so you toss the probably bad salad out.  Only half an hour later you find yourself gripping your stomach and cursing yourself fo not eating any better.  You are experiencing enormous pressure to eat well but always feeling like you came up short.  There have been periods where it has gotten so bad that you begin to realize that perhaps the reason you’re so tired is because you didn’t do a great enough job with food intake earlier.

Somewhere along the line, this became a bit of an obsession of mine.  I don’t know when it happened.  Given all the other things I have had going on in my 20s and early 30s it never really took centre stage  until earlier this year when I made a New Year’s Resolution to look at my food intake and try to figure out some of what I believed to be medication side effects.  I discovered a word that changed my perspective: orthorexia. It’s a fancy word used to describe people who have an unhealthy obsession with healthy food.   It’s a crazy thing to try to explain to someone, especially considering the problems earlier in life I had with food and dieting.  Add to that the anxiety of wasting,when in one month I have lost 30-50lbs from being  ill and having full blown AIDS.  There developed this incredible urge to try and eat better and the feeling not doing so could mean disaster.

The idea of this disorder, if it is a disorder, is quite controversial and has many in the health food industry up in arms.  In the summer, during a difficult struggle with this, I wrote a response on another website coming out about my personal battle that I want to share here in the hope that it sheds some light on this:

“I wanted to share my experience. Earlier this year I made a decision that I wanted to learn to cook more from home for myself. A New Year’s Resolution if you will that I had tried several times and all attempts failed. For the past 12-15yrs I have basically consumed almost every single meal I’ve had out at restaurants, take out places, or delivery etc. To eat healthy like that is a huge expenditure on my finances. I probably spend as much on eating out as I do on rent. I had adapted most of my life around doing this that I hadn’t even noticed till I wanted to stop. It never occurred to me how much I was afraid of food. Or rather afraid of making unhealthy food that may possible make me sick or ill.

In trying to cook for myself I would come home for 6pm and go into the kitchen and then it would suddenly be 11pm and I still hadn’t eaten anything. I get so overwhelmed sometimes that I would just rather not eat any food at all then eat something that might make me sick. This wouldn’t be so bad I think except that I work in the health and fitness industry and require my body to be in top physical form for the 10-15 classes I teach each week. Seriously. Like I mentally actually know better. Since I’m running all over the city from club to club everything is eaten on the go and bought at the various places I’m at.

Grocery stores, like kitchens, are another place of high stress. 3 months ago I was in one as the meal plan grocery list called for bean sprouts, but it didn’t specifically say how many bean sprouts or what kind or how it was supposed to be packaged and I seriously had a meltdown! Thank god for kind sympathetic strangers!! I even spent an hour searching Google for information on fresh ginger to ginger in a plastic tube that’s been pre-minced. I opted for the fresh ginger because I didn’t know what exactly was in the plastic tube plus the leaking of plastic into the “ginger” itself bothered me. Three days later I threw out the fresh ginger because I didn’t know if it had gone bad or not and couldn’t risk eating it or using it to find out.

I started seeking help back in February and now have a team of people supporting me. I have been working with a naturopath, dietician and psychotherapist plus practice a lot of yoga and meditation. 5 weeks ago my food goal was broken down to much more attainable goals. Right now I’m just trying to eat 3 meals a day. I know this may sound ridiculous to some people. It sounds ridiculous to me!!! But it’s been hard to make that for myself. But I am doing it. It doesn’t matter what is in the food as long as I’m eating it and making it myself. There are many days when I just stand there in my kitchen looking at the food frozen. I’m overwhelmed and have had to make many calls to friends just to take and breathe with them while I’m in there. But it’s getting done and I’m eating. I have notes and instructions and can still eat out every day if I want, but do attempt to make at least one meal in my own home.

I know some people may comment about all the techno babble and stuff about food but please, please, don’t. I really can’t handle it. Even reading some of the posts from some people it was clear to me that many don’t get it. Some of you I totally relate with, some of you posted things that made me dizzy and light-headed, and some of you posted things that make me not want to have dinner tonight or breakfast tomorrow.

This is me. This is my heart. This is me trying to get better and digest (Pun intended) the truth and reality of my existence.”

I wanted to say that things are going well.  There are several times when I need to check-in with myself to see if I have gone without food or avoided my kitchen on a regular basis.  As problems go, it’s quite a pathetic one to have and sounds crazy.  But it’s my own private crazy and now, I guess, it’s not so private anymore.

 Metta.

It’s the most awful thing.  The alarm is going off and you’re half conscious laying there in bed trying to figure out how on earth it can be morning already.  Rolling over and trying to stand on your feet, after several snooze button tests you try to figure out after all that sleep why on earth you are still so tired.

Have you ever just stood in line at a bank or grocery store and just for a few seconds dozed off?  Or pulled up on the couch and curled in after dinner for a bit only to find yourself still unsettled?  Maybe not eating enough or not getting to bed on time are contributing factors.  Many of us can use work in those areas and they are definite possibilities.

But perhaps it’s something else.  Rest.  It’s something we all want to do but never seem to have time for.  No matter how busy we are in life there never seems to be enough time to relax.  We sometimes go to extremes in order to obtain it.  We take large fanciful trips abroad. Then the bills become daunting so that you have to work harder to compensate for the time you weren’t working  “You can rest when you’re dead!” is a popular motto and perhaps that works for some.  But is it possible to have a great, fulfilling and active life and still be fully rested ?

Doctors prescribe it to patients.  Bosses suggest it to employees . But where in this hustle  did someone ever teach us how to rest?

Hi.  I’m Daniel.  I’m going to be your Rest Teacher today!

Earlier I wrote an article about breathing. We learned there is importance in pausing for a moment. More recently I wrote an article about Time - taking the opportunity to plan for the things you desire for your life. But many of my students are coming to my yoga classes for is a desire for less stress in their lives. What they are usually referring to is a desire for more rest and relaxation.

How do we go about doing it? It’s actually easier than you think. It almost seems too easy. I could go into the mechanics of how and when the body calms down and the brain slows down, but ultimately I’d like to keep this quite simple and not ruin the magic of the process.

First, when I refer to rest, I'm not talking about sleep. Think of those times when you woke to find yourself tired. Although you were sleeping, you never reached a state of rest. They are two very different places. What rest is trying to do is bring us to a place between action and movement and unconsciousness.  Perhaps why many of us can’t reach this place is because of lack of sleep. We get so little of it that we hit the pillow and then within seconds are out like a light. A truly rested person takes about 10-15 minutes to fall asleep. We are not talking about meditation.  Meditation is much more active than rest. (An article on meditation will come soon.)  What we aim for is a place where the mind, body and spirit are at a place of inaction but still conscious and awake.  It’s a place we’re not trying to get to or forcing ourself to maintain, but one that happens more by accident as we let go.

What I would like to offer up is an opportunity to practice resting. This will be a one month challenge from December 1 to January 1 where we can try to practice resting together. I have created a Facebook event here:

The directions are pretty simple.. The effects, however, can be profound. The yoga posture that is going to be used in this is savasana – the corpse pose.To practice this, simply lay down on the floor, carpet, yoga mat, towel, (not a bed or the couch) and be still in the posture.

I have included a video on savasana (resting pose) done by two of my friends and colleagues – Jackie and Shan - below.

I have set three levels of difficulty for this challenge, all based on time - five minutes, 10 minutes or 20 minutes in savasana, once a day. Try to aim for 20 minutes a day, but I realize that isn’t always possible for those of us who are on the go.

Props such as an eyebag, bolsters or blocks for under the knees etc can be used. Ultimately it's about taking time for yourself, your own life and your own happiness, to be still. This is to be practiced beyond your regular yoga classes, if that is part of your practice. They can be done with friends or family if you are doing this as a challenge together, but ultimately done outside of a yoga class teaching setting as a part of your daily life.

Things to consider making this work even better:

1. Stay in the posture for the full duration of time (20min if you are doing that challenge everyday). Set a timer to help remember when it's time to end.
2. Keep the room and background noise down. Quiet works better, but if some music must be played, keep it soft, and at really low volume.
3. Keep warm. This may be turning on the heat or wearing enough comfortable clothing.  Perhaps covering with a light blanket may help.
4. Keep the room/space on the dark side. Or perhaps consider using something like an eye bag over the eyes (a rolled up facecloth may work well too) or just keep the lighting low or off completely.
5. Make it your own. Perhaps there is something you do in daily reflection or part of your own personal devotion. Incorporate whatever you feel enhances this to your beliefs but take that time of stillness.
6. Tell people about it. Invite your friends and family and colleagues to join in. Share your experience here with others who will be doing this with you.

Getting it done earlier in the day is easier then skipping it and trying to find time later. I usually try to do this shortly after waking up. It’s a nice transition into consciousness and helps re-set me for the day ahead.

I would love to hear feedback on how this goes, here in the comments section. This month I will have some related articles and challenge opportunities that all tie in with trying to cultivate more rest for the body, mind and spirit.  My hope and desire is that we can find a more rested holiday season and enter the New Year fully able to embrace and truly enjoy life and what it has to offer. One breathe, one beat, one savasana at a time. 

Metta.